Newt Gingrich and Al Gore squared off in a debate about some dump named, “Earth.” Carnage ladies and gentleman! Absolute carnage! Guts of furry little creatures, whale heads on wooden stakes, and hot air reeking of sulfur filled the room before this little man-made explosion. From AP (I said pee):
Taking a seat after Gore and Warner had said their farewells, Gingrich read from a statement he had released on his Web site earlier in the day. He opposes the legislation and proposed instead a 38-point plan he called “green conservatism.”
Ever the history teacher, he told a story about the Viking King Canute — Gingrich’s namesake, he said — who tried and failed to push back the ocean in an attempt to show his supporters that he was not, alas, all-powerful.
“This is a hint,” Gingrich said. The bill, he added, shows “failure to learn the lesson” of King Canute — if in fact the authors, or anyone else present, had ever before heard of Canute. (Gore had already left.)
The prospect of actually reducing carbon as outlined by Democrats and President Barack Obama?
“A fantasy,” Gingrich declared.
Fuck yeah Newt Gingrich’s namesake! All praise King Canewt! It’s important to learn from history and separate it from “fantasy.” However, King Canewt did not know Kung Fu. Like President Obama. (h/t JamieLynn84)