The Court: You may proceed.
Cow: Moo. Moo.
Mr. Dickstein: Thank you. Um, Madam Cow, you claim Patrolman Robert Melia mooed you is that correct?
Mr. Dickstein: I guess you don’t find it funny that he mooed you in a town called Moorestown do you?
Cow: Moo Moo.
Mr. Dickstein: I mean, it is New Jersey.
Mr. Dickstein: Would you like a Kleenex? It’s not your fault you’re from Jersey and wear cheap lipstick from 1982.
Cow: Moo Moo.
Mr. Dickstein: I have one last question Your Honor.
The Court: Give the poor girl some grass and proceed counselor.
Mr. Bovine: Objection! Leading the winess.
Mr. Dickstein: I was just taking her to our inner courtroom pasture.
The Court: Overruled. I’ll give you wide latitude.
Mr. Bovine: (mumbling) I’ll bet Cow has some wide latitude.
The Court: What was that Mr. Bovine?
Mr. Bovine: Nothing.
The Court: Continue.
Mr. Dickstein: Thank you. Cow, did Patroman Melia moo you four times on four separate occasions? Moo or Moo Moo. Answer the question!
Cow: Moo! Moo! Moo! Mooooo Moooo Moooo Mooooo Moooooo.
Mr. Dickstein: Let the record relect that was a single “Moo.” Someone get her a Kleenex.
Did you consent? Did you say “Moo?” Or, ‘Moo Moo?”
Cow: Moo Moo!
Mr. Dickstein: Thank you. Nothing further.
Cow. Moooooooooooooooooooooooo. Mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.
WHEREUPON, udder converstations were held off the record.